Characteristics of a Servant Leader

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In my last blog, I presented a new model of leadership proposition. If you haven’t read it, I strongly encourage you to peruse that first. You can also check out my upcoming workshop on Servant Leadership.   

I previously wrote about servant leadership being more of a lifestyle than a technique or a skill. I identified several characteristics, which I would like to expound on further in this post. 

I highlighted six qualities of a servant leader: patience, empathy, humility, selflessness, honesty, and commitment. Some of you may think that these are touchy-feely traits. But, on the contrary, one must be tough to be a servant leader. Read on. 

Patience

Patience is showing self-control. It is being patient with yourself and the people you work with. If leaders are short-tempered and easily agitated, they are creating an unsafe environment for people to make mistakes. Does it mean that leaders should overlook mistakes or ignore shortcomings? Does it mean that they don’t get angry? 

Not at all. The leader has the responsibility to hold their people accountable. If staff members make a mistake, begin with teaching and training them. If, however, they do not learn from their mistakes, the leader can then use progressive discipline.  

School leaders must model good behavior for their teachers, staff, and students. If school leaders are out of control and show impatience, they cannot expect the team to be under control or behave responsibly. Showing patience also means not looking over the shoulders of and micro-managing your direct reports. 

I know what it means to be a divisional head or a head of school; work is never-ending. You move from task to task, and there is probably a long line of staff members waiting to talk with you. Just relax and take deep breaths. Taking slow deep breaths can help calm the mind and body. When slow deep breathing didn’t help, I took a walk around the campus. It helped clear my head and decompress.   

Empathy

Empathy is putting yourself in the shoes of the people you work with and connecting with them. One way to do this is active listening. Attempt to see things as the speaker sees them and attempt to feel what they are feeling. For example, a principal confided, “Early in my career, I used to believe my job was to solve every teacher or student’s problem when they came to me. But, over the years I have learned that just listening to them eases their burden.” 

Look for opportunities to get to know your colleagues and their family. Pay attention to the information presented in the conversation.  

Humility

Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It is about knowing oneself and one’s limitations. It is being authentic. Know-it-alls and arrogant leaders are a turn-off for most people. Egos build walls and become obstacles with the people you work with. Besides, such arrogance is a dishonest pretense because no one knows everything or has it all together. Therefore, as leaders, we need our colleagues. We need each other. Aloofness and pretense do not work. 

Humility is the ability to be real with yourself and with people. In other words, the leader admits wrong when mistakes are made and is willing to learn from their direct reports. 

This is particularly important for leaders, but we can all gain from hearing what others think of us. Take time to hear feedback from your peers and your direct reports. Make it clear to them that you welcome their opinion. Then, listen to the input with an open mind. I oversaw all non-teaching functions as a business administration director, and I often had two or three department heads whom I could ask for a forthright evaluation. I was always grateful for their candid observation.  

Selflessness

Selflessness is meeting the needs of others before your own needs and wants. On the other hand, selfishness is “my needs first, your needs come second.” A servant leader is a leader who serves rather than one who expects to be served. Selflessness doesn’t come naturally. I encourage leaders to take time to self-reflect on their thoughts, habits, and actions. Take a few moments to look back on your day. Ask, “how did I treat my direct reports? Where could I have cared or given more? Was I available to others – direct reports, teachers, parents, or even vendors?”  

Some readers might protest, “If we are constantly meeting other people’s needs, won’t they start to take advantage of us?” But, on the contrary, my experience has been that if I had my staff members’ interests at heart and I sought to meet their needs first, they were inevitably more responsive to my leading. 

Honesty

Honesty is “being free from deception.” Most employees put honesty at the top of their list of what they look for in a great leader. We are to be honest in words and behavior. Honesty means clarifying our expectations for our direct reports, being open with your doubts and fears about an idea, your own performance, an employee’s performance, being able to admit mistakes openly, being willing to present the bad news, and giving colleagues feedback candidly. 

Too many of us think that power comes from our ability to maintain control. But, quite the opposite, our power comes from realizing that we can’t be in control and that we must depend on others. 

Being honest is being courageous. 

Commitment 

The committed leader is dedicated to growing, stretching, and continuously improving themselves, direct reports, and the organization they work for. They are committed to becoming the best leader they can be for the people they lead. This commitment should inspire the team, motivating them to become the best they can be.

If you are not taking your commitments as a leader seriously, you have probably forgotten why it’s so important. Being a servant leader is the right thing to do. Remind yourself of the deeper reason you committed to being a servant leader. Write out why you care so much about this commitment and put that somewhere you will see it regularly. As for me, I read books, articles, and blogs about servant leadership every 2-3 months, and I organize book discussions on servant leadership with managers and my department heads. 

Servant Leadership Skills

Though servant leadership is about a way of life rather than a technique, there are some skills that an aspiring servant leader can acquire. These abilities include, but are not limited to, establishing a vision for your department/division or the whole school, communicating the vision to them, building relationships and trust with the people you work with, engaging and developing your team, actively listening, empowering your direct reports, and persuading without being forceful. The main goal is to show the team that you have their best interest at heart and want to help them succeed. I will be facilitating a once-a-year “Intercultural and Servant Leadership” workshop to illustrate these abilities in further detail. To learn more about the upcoming workshop, please click here.

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