Focus on What You Can Control When Everything Else Feels Like Chaos
The Struggle to Let Go and Lean Into What I Can Control
This month’s newsletter is a bit of an overshare, but hey, if you’ve been around for a while, you’ll know that’s nothing new!
So here it is: I’ve been avoiding the elephant in the room—I’m moving countries this July. My little fam and I are moving to Malaysia, leaving Shanghai behind after five years. And as much as I know this is right for my family, and despite the fact there have been some bleak times in China, it is the place where we’ve raised our daughter from being a toddler. Her formative years have been in Shanghai. We’ve changed as people during this time too. Big shifts have occurred here—many, many blessings, wonderful friendships... so I can’t help but feel a little sad and anxious about it all.
Quite honestly, I’ve been in complete denial about it, probably as a coping mechanism. If I think about everything at once, I risk drowning in a sea of panic, overwhelm, and sadness. But I'm also incredibly excited for the move and the opportunities that will follow. It’s not one or the other. It’s both, and that’s a bloody nuisance. It’s like when you feel guilty for smiling after really sad news. You feel unexplainably guilty, but you still have good reason to smile, to laugh, to feel excitement.
For those wondering, my work won’t change much apart from the air miles (and yes, it’s about time I join an alliance!). What will change is how I manage my time and priorities. With so much ahead and so many moving pieces, I’ve realized I need to be much better about planning my calendar and, frankly, saying no to things that just aren’t feasible anymore.
To navigate this time of change, I’ve decided to focus on one thing I can control: my health. Specifically, healthy eating. It’s simple, right? But in the face of all the moving parts, I knew I had to find one anchor. Something I can take action on right now. Something I can geek out on. With everything else feeling uncertain, this is my one step I can control and focus my energy on. And let’s face it, it’s also a time I would normally go off the ‘food rails’ and could easily end up arriving in KL 15 lbs heavier, feeling really uncomfortable about meeting new people and making a good impression.
I’ve learned that, in times of uncertainty, focusing on one small, positive action can help me feel grounded and in control. It doesn’t fix everything (and it certainly doesn't pack boxes, make appointments, or do life admin), but it does give me something tangible to focus on amidst the madness.
So, if you’re feeling the stress of endless to-do lists, shifting priorities, or just the weight of a million things you can’t control, I challenge you to find one thing—one little area where you can take back control. It could be super small, like how you structure your day or drinking more water. Whatever it is, just find something that is enough to create a sense of calm and purpose.
We can’t control everything, but we can weigh out chickpeas and turn broccoli into crisps.
Take a moment this month to reflect:
What’s one thing you can take control of today?
How can that one thing help you feel more grounded and ready for what’s ahead?
So this month, I’m inviting you to join me in focusing on one thing that you can control. Something simple. What can you choose to focus your energy on, amidst all the other ‘stuff’?
3 Tips for Staying Grounded Amidst the Chaos
Pick one thing to control
What’s one small area in your life or work that you can truly influence right now? Take it one step at a time.
Celebrate the tiny wins
When the world feels like it's spinning, sometimes the best thing you can do is focus on one small win. Whether it's making a healthy choice or just ticking something off your list, it’s those little victories that help keep you grounded. BTW, I’m not deleting things off my to-do list right now; I’m using strikethrough instead! Helps me to feel more accomplished as I conquer my list and spurs me on.
Give yourself a break
If you’re juggling a million things, step back for a moment. Take a breath, enjoy a brew (cup of tea for non-Brits), or stretch it out. (On that note, I’m out of decaf teabags a month too early—please send supplies to Changning!)
I’ll be taking a break from newsletter writing next month, seeing as I’m about to relocate and most of you will be on some form of holibob! I’ll see you back here in August for all the gossip on the move and whether I managed to sustain weighing out my chickpeas.
Warmly,
Claire
P.S. If you’re actually reading this on June 16th then it’s my birthday today! I’m accepting Starbucks gift vouchers in multiple currencies ;-) More jokes! But also, feel free to buy me a coffee any time you like!